1. Assessment of First Performance
Archie and Moti welcomed Tiger and me back into the fold. Moti, though, expressed a reservation.
“Peter’le, why didn’t you explain things to Eve before you punched her?”
“I thought it best to proceed without delay.”
“But then you needed Lord Pan’s help!”
“Moti is right: it was your mission, Peter’le. So why the need for help?” volunteered Archie.
“But Theophil did not appear until after the mission had been completed. You see, Archie, he did not intervene. He simply helped me to explain. Actually, there was no need to elucidate. By right I was entitled to withdraw the instant I delivered the punch. In the worst case, Eve would have remained puzzled!”
“Eve is not the type of lady who remains puzzled for long. She is too forthright,” Tiger stepped to my aid.
“Oh well,” conceded Archie. “But now we have to plan your next punch. You must not restrict yourself to members of one culture!”
2. Planning the Next Punch
His words made sense. There were, of course, quite a number of Biblical characters deserving treatment. One was Moses who led his people astray for forty years in the desert. Another was Samuel, who took exception to Saul’s refusal to murder Amelekite women and children. Yet another was the famous Rabbi Gamliel, who applied one set of rules to the people and a more liberal doctrine to himself.
Still, we had to move with the times. Dealing with representatives of different cultures was essential. Initially I looked in the direction of China. Instantly, Archie was up in arms. He pointed out that the two main Western cultures were the Judaic and the Greek. True, they were clumsily fused by Roman believers. All the same, Greece occupied a place of its own.
“But there are so many deserving noses amongst the Greek!”
“Why don’t you go quickly through them, Peter’le” opined Tiger.
The first name on my list was Homer. His poetry put the emphasis on style rather than substance. Others to be considered included Pericles and Plato. The former convinced his people to press on with a war they were bound to lose. The latter was a dogmatic thinker, who produced heaps of unreadable dialogues discussing ‘freedom’, copied laboriously by his slaves. What did these poor scriveners think when they were ordered to fill their inkpots and reproduce the great man’s Republic?
The full list of deserving noses appeared endless. As I viewed it with despair, Moti looked with concern at both Archie and me. Sensing he wanted to convey a discreet message, I climbed up his trunk.
“What are you worried about?”
“Archie looks jaundiced. He wonders why you have not selected him.”
“I would never punch a friend, Moti: you know this.”
“Oh, I know. But your mission is to punch the most remarkable figures in history. Archie believes he is one of them. He feels slighted.”
“What were the two of you mumbling about?” Archie manifested his chagrin as soon as I slid down Moti’s trunk.
“Moti thinks I ought to concentrate on contributors to Greece’s greatest gift to mankind.”
“And what would that be? Philosophy, art, poetry and mathematics reached a height in our culture.”
“But all of these progressed further in later periods. The concept of the zero, for instance, originated in India. And didn’t Leibniz’s calculus leave all Greek mathematicians far behind?” volunteered Tiger.
“You mean we were just a midwife or, perhaps, a bubble?”
“Peter’le thinks that Greece’s most lasting contribution to mankind was in another field; a field with which you, Archie, have no affinity,” retorted Tiger. “So why don’t you accompany him this time? I can’t imagine a more appropriate ‘objective bystander’ than your good self.”